The Problem With Thinking

The problem with thinking is that it makes my brain hurt.

The problem with thinking is that I can't get out all the tangled mess that's in my head.

The problem with thinking is that it so rarely turns into action.

The problem with thinking is that I don't know if what I'm thinking is crazy.

The problem with thinking is that I don't know if what I'm thinking is right.

The problem with thinking is that if what I am thinking is right then how do I help other people think like that, turn that into action and promote the Kingdom of God on earth?

The problem with thinking is that so often it just feels like I'm spinning my wheels.

I think I'll stop thinking now....

Back to School//Round 5

It's that time again.

The time I have to slow down on the movie-watching, book-reading, free-time-having, state-hopping activities and buckle back down into school.

It's now time for coffee-guzzling, textbook-reading, late-night-having, exam-cramming, list-making, hour-by-hour-planning, classroom-sitting, 6-hour-commuting, brain-dead-walking once more.

Complaints aside I'm excited for the classes I'm enrolled in this semester. Project-heavy, but will be purposeful for ministry and applicable for my life. (I hope.)

Are ya'll back in school this semester? If so, what transitions are you trying to make again?

Happy back to school, Spring 2011!

Talk Thursday // Still Holdin' On

When I was in junior high boy bands were incredibly prolific. Backstreet Boys, N*SYNC, 98 Degrees, O-Town...you name it, we knew 'em. I was never one of those screamy, crying girls who wept over the prospect of seeing one of these bands live (usually), but I will admit that I loved every one of them. My sister and I weren't allowed to hang posters of boys on our walls, but I had a binder full of TigerBeat and Teen HeartThrob pages cut out and stuck in page protectors.

As much as I loved Backstreet Boys and N*SYNC and all those guys, there was a band that I loved the most. My binder had the lead singer about every other page and I distinctly remember writing our names together (SL + TH). I kept it under wraps because it was the source of a lot of mockery. However, I'm older now and a little more secure in my identity. So I'm just going to claim this...

I loved Hanson.

Yeah, these kids.

And you know what, I still love Hanson.

I have been waiting for years for another Hanson album (and waiting to get the courage/self-esteem to admit this love). But now it's finally here...

It's an excellent album. And it satisfies both the junior high Sarah's love for Hanson & the 25-year-old Sarah's need for good music.

Most of you probably had a celebrity crush once upon a time. Maybe admitting it forced you to endure much mocking. Maybe you still harbor this love secretly.

But let's get it all out there...

Who were you all about back in the day? Was it mock-worthy? And if they put out a new CD/movie/book/TV show how soon would you snatch that up?

(And Taylor Hanson, if you're reading this, I still love you. =) )

Sermonizing

Today is my day off, so I once again find myself at Cutter's Point Coffee in Covington, hoping to get a sermon on the 10 Commandments busted out here soon. I am having a hard time trying to figure out what to say and how to say it. I'm preaching this sermon at a conference next week as well at my church. So I have to think about both of my audiences. And the 10 Commandments cover a wide spectrum of things to discuss.

I know today's not a "Talk Thursday", but if you were going to hear a sermon about the 10 Commandments, what would you want to know about them?

Luckily, I have all the fixin's for a productive day...

Here's to a good day of writing. Cheers! =)

Talk Thursday // "In the Schrute family..."

It's no secret that this blogger loves her some traditions. It's kind of amazing that I'm not Catholic or Jewish or something because I love traditions and ritual. It makes me feel connected to things that are bigger than just me.

That being said, we Lewis' have some Christmas traditions. Christmas itself is pretty freaking awesome, you know, the birth of Jesus and all. But these Lewis family traditions make it so much more anticipatory! (Is that even a word?!) When/if I ever get married, I'm not sure how much I'll be willing to flex on giving some of these traditions up or "renovating" them. Maybe it's good I don't want to get married - I'm far too selfish. =)

But in Hephzibah list-style of awesomeness, here's some of the Lewis' family traditions that I am looking forward to (again) this year:

* Christmas Eve light-looking

* An entire bottle of Martinelli's Sparkling Cider in my stocking

* Making & eating sausage balls

* Watching "White Christmas", "The Christmas Box" & "Little Women"

* Going to a Christmas movie

* Listening to Harry Connick Jr's "When My Heart Finds Christmas", Steven Curtis Chapman's "Music of Christmas", Avalon's "Joy" & CeCe Winans Christmas albums on repeat until I can't yuletide no mo'!

* Hopefully a potato famine story from my dad

* Getting worked up when I see the 3 Wise Men in a Nativity Scene =)

And our newest tradition that I hope only has to be intermittant:

* Skyping with the Sister & BIL, which for long periods of time is slightly awkward, but always awesome.

I love Christmas. Mostly because I love Jesus, but also because I appreciate the fact that its a time for us all to stop what we're doing and be together, even if "together" means Skype. It's a time to be with people who know you and love you and want to share in traditions together.

So, what are some of your traditions?

Merry Christmas, everyone!!

Talk Thursday//Final Countdown

It's 6.15 pm on Thurday night.

Thursday night of finals week.

And what exactly am I doing?

Writing a Talk Thursday blog.

Not writing my BIB 501 paper.

That's due midnight Saturday.

Two days to end this fall term.

One paper, one Hebrew exam.

And it's over. But I can't rally.

Anyone else feel like this?

Thiiiiiis close to the end...

But no gas left in the tank.

If you're in this boat with me,

And you have no ooomph left,

Let us know what you're doing

and what you're doing to rally

Till the bitter end of this time.

(And is it supersad how excited

I am to get these lines to match

in length for this entire post???

I'm a mega-nerd and really need

to consider getting help. Yeah...)

Surprises

Let's be real: most of our mothers are not "ghetto fabulous." Generally they don't even know what that means. But sometimes they can surprise. I present textual proof of that.

A verbatim text from my mother this morning at 8.44 am:

Mom: Forgot to tell you there was a girl with apple bottom jeans at church on Sunday. I had never seen them before! She was not going low low low and she did not have boots with the fur. :0)

Most. Amazing. Text. Ever.

Thanks Mom. =)

Talk Thursday//Year In Statuses

Like many people, I am sucked into random things on Facebook. It's like a Mecca of time-wasting. Everyone knows it...everyone judges it. And since I have much to do and no time to waste of COURSE I spent time last night making one of those now popular "My Year In Statuses" things.

As I perused and picked my Facebook statuses from the last year to add into this collage, I saw that every other status was about one of 4 things: coffee, music, homework, or the weather.

Part of me wonders if that's really what my life revolves around or if that's just what gets put up on Facebook or are those two the same thing? As I look back over 2010, I see homework, stress, Veritas, and my family. But apparently I talk about coffee more than I talk about my church and the weather more than my family.

And I wonder if that's ok.

Now, normally people wait until December 31 to post about poignant year-reflective things, but we're ahead of the curve here. =)

So...if you were to make a list of what it is that you spent your time talking about over 2010, would it be the same thing that you spent your year doing? How did you spend 2010?

Monday Is A Good Day for Bad Poetry//Finals Week ed!

Festive Christmas lights are a-twinkle,
Wrapping paper is about to unwrinkle.

Laughter and joy abound in the streets
And smiles and coffee are shared when people meet.

But what does this Yuletide season mean for those of us in school?
That in fact we are sinking in a finals week frenzied pool.

While papers need writing,
Its lack of motivation I'm fighting.

Greek is turning my brain to slush,
while Hebrew is furthering making it mush.

Why, God, why do I continue to invite punishment?
These classes are causing me grave astonishment.

One more week of which to push through
then I can happily skip in the morning dew
At least until after New Years
then once again I will need a few beers
to make it through another semester go-round
where you can find me banging my head on the ground.

Talk Thursday//Things that make the baby Jesus cry

1. Cold oatmeal

2. The smell of broccoli soup in enclosed spaces

3. Farmville

4. Wet socks

5. Tepid bathwater

6. When cell phones say "No Service"

7. Cats

8. Blue Christmas lights

9. Dropping food on a solid colored shirt

10. Greek homework


This list felt more like an anti-Oprah's favorite things list than things that make the baby Jesus cry. But I was going for seasonal relevance.

We have good things. Like steak...hamburgers...football...glitter. Then we all have bad things. This is not to be a Debbie Downer, but let's admit it: sometimes things are stupid.

So, what things in your world are the worst? What things do you think make the baby Jesus cry?

This Is What Happens When Adults Take A Snow Day

It is once again winter in the Evergreen State. Not just the rainy kind of winter,but blizzard-Alaskan-super-charged winter. For two days the state was practically shut down due to ice and snow. And as a lemming, I decided to take a snow day. My roommate had a late start to her work day, so we decided that it wouldn't be a snow day without playing. Here is picture evidence that adults can play in the snow too. =)

The view from our front yard yesterday morning.

We were bundled and ready to play!

My BA snow angel.

Janet working on her snow angel.

We tried to make a snowman, but we're not so talented, thus it became....

A snow alien!

The day also consisted of a huge pot of coffee while writing a huge paper and a frozen, slippery walk to the deli. It was delightful and a great reminder that sometimes, even adults, need to stop and enjoy the snow. =)

Happy winter, friends!

Talk Friday//Thanksmas

Well, I was so busy stuffing my face and cheering against the Cowboys that I completely forgot to put up my Talk Thursday!

And as much as I love "giving Thanksgiving a chance" I must admit, I get far more excited for the day AFTER Thanksgiving.

Is it the shopping?, you ask.

HECK no. (That is so vehemently no that were this not a family-friendly blog, there would be expletives there.)

Is it the cold turkey sandwiches and sausage ball leftovers?, you ponder.

Ehh...Slightly.

Is it the fact that I can now listen to as many Christmas jams as I want completely guilt-free?

Absolutely.

As you are all (or should be) well aware, I am so against Christmas music before the day after Thanksgiving. However, today is Friday. Some people call it "Black Friday" - I call it "Steven Curtis Chapman/Amy Grant/NSYNC/Harry Connick Jr On Repeat" Day or SCCAGNSYNCHCJORD if you will. (Tell your friends - it's gonna be a thing). Today through December 27th I will delightfully and deliriously listen to a barrage of Christmas music - old, new, croonie, poppy. My ringtones have been set (The Trans-Siberian Orchestra, "Sleigh Ride" and "Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairies"), decorations will go up tomorrow and Christmas movie watching will commence soon.

So in the general fashion of a holiday mash-up:
What are you thankful for on Black Friday? Do you celebrate Christmas starting in August like the retail stores or do you wait for this day?

Happy Thanksmas! =)

Talk Thursday//Awkward Turtle

One of the greatest and most awkward games to play (in my humble opinion) is the Fortune Cookie Game. If you've never played it, you've likely lived under a rock for the last 82 years and you've obviously never had Chinese food with me. (And if the latter is true, let's go eat. I love sweet 'n sour chicken!)

But for any "newbies" out there, what you do is after eating your delicious and not-at-all nutritious sweet 'n sour chicken and moo goo gai pan, you enjoy a tastless, origami-cut cookie. When you get your fortune out, whatever it says, you tack on "in bed" at the end. Ex: "A thrilling time is in your immediate future....in bed." Or: "Your everlasting patience will be rewarded sooner or later...in bed." Giggling ensues, awkwardness commences...it's delightful. Unless you eat Chinese food with your parents/grandparents. Then intense amounts of blushing occurs but nothing is allowed to be verbalized...cause that's worse than awkward...that's awkWEIRD.

I love awkwardness. Mostly because I have no filter. And no shame. But also because I LOVE to tell stories. And awkward moments make the most amazing stories. Fortune cookie moments invite awkward, but so do other things.

Like getting caught checking out the ring finger of an incredibly good looking guy to hear "Yeah, my wife likes those same cups that you're holding in your hand."
Or
Running into a lightpole because you were too busy flirting than looking where you were going.
Or
Having a texting conversation about your ovaries with a boy you just met. And now will never likely talk to again.
Or having a piece of paper fall out of your Bible with a memory verse from 1 John on one side and the words "sex kitten" on the other. While in the seminary lounge. With seminarians around.

Wow...those were all about boys. And personal. You're welcome. =)

So since today is Talk Thursday and we like to share things:
What is the most awkward moment you've ever had? And how do you generally respond to super-awkward things? Do you invite the awkward (ie: the Fortune Cookie Game) or just fall into it (like whenever you're around a member of the opposite sex)?

Spirals

Discouragement is the vacuum of life.

But not in a cleanliness way.

It sucks out all joy.

All hope.

All possibility.

Discouragement drains the soul, leaving despair in it's wake.

Despair enables a negative perspective on everything.

Nothing is going...

Can go...

Or will go right.

No one can empathize.

And no one can understand.

Despair leads to a lack of faith.

In ourselves...

In our futures...

In our presents...

In God.

And once we've lost that....

We've lost it all.

On Why Being Human Sometimes Sucks

YesterdayI had to recite Genesis 1.1-5 in Hebrew to my professor and then read aloud Deuteronomy 6.4-9 to her. Because of the tremendous difficulty of this situation I forewarned her that sometimes, when I'm stressed and discouraged and I forget things and though Jesus and I are working on it, sometimes I swear.


I did not expect her reaction.

She laughed and said that it was her most favorite reading ever. And we hadn't even started yet. This made me feel good. Then when she composed herself (which was only barely composed) she said, "That is so refreshingly human, Sarah. I really appreciate that." This comment made me feel...not as good. And it took me well over an hour to be able to figure out why her comment said completely in kindness and as a compliment made my heart hurt a little.

I have tried to live my life as transparently as possible. 98% of the time I am the same Sarah on Friday nights that I am on Sunday mornings that I am on Tuesday and Thursday afternoons. Obviously there are moments where I want to hide who I am (there's that pesky 2%) and I'll lie and distort who I am. And I also understand that there are situations that require less..."flamboyant" Sarah - ie: for work there is more structured behavioral expectation and maybe not swearing in from of my Orchard kiddos. But 98% of the time my personality doesn't change.

While I truly believe this is a good thing and that Jesus wants us to live our lives in vulnerability and openly and honestly about who we are in Him, there is still a tension.

As someone who wholeheartedly believes in the life, death and resurrection of Jesus, I also believe that the same Spirit that rose Jesus Christ from the dead resides in my body. And I believe that the Bible tells us that those who are in faith in Jesus are to walk by the Spirit and not by the flesh (see the apostle Paul's discussion as it is pretty much a word-for-word screen shot of my brain).

We are called to live honestly, openly, vulnerably in communion with one another and with God in the hope that others will desire to be open and vulnerable and honest with themselves and with God. To this end I generally succeed.

However, we are also called to live holy lives, to be set apart, to walk by the power of the Spirit. Therein lies my tension.

As a seminarian, I am around a lot of very...I don't think pious is the right word...people. They are not "holier than thou" teetotalers, but they love Jesus with all their hearts and they talk about that and sometimes it makes me feel...too human in comparison. Because more often than not I find myself living completely in my humanity more than I find myself desiring to live as a holy child of God, physically, emotionally, mentally... Living in my humanity is comfortable, it is easy. I don't have to strive to be anything more than what I am. And I think God loves that. He wants us to just be.

But I know that He wants more for us as well. He wants us to live justly and love mercy and walk humbly and have our minds dwell on good things. But my humanity is so much more accessible. And that's frustrating.

I love that my Hebrew professor felt that my vulnerability made me more "human" and hopefully she felt the freedom to be vulnerable as well - since that is the goal.

But some days I wouldn't mind being told that it was refreshing how much my speech caused someone else to love Jesus.

Guess that's just the human in me though.

Non Date Date

So I'm going on what I call a "non date date" tonight.

I say it's a non-date because I asked (and tradition tells that girls don't ask boys out on dates (apparently traditionalists don't live in Seattle)) and because it was a fill-in situation thing - extra concert ticket for cute boy. =)

However, I am calling it a pseudo-date because a) it's a concert w/ a boy b) there has been much flirting and c) I spent WAY too much trying to plan this outfit. =)

I haven't dated in EONS of time (see last HORRIFIC date experience) so I'm a little concerned about how awkward I am. And I am indeed awkward.

So, what's a non-date to you? What's considered a date? How do people know?!

What a world, what a world, what a world, what a world.....

Talk Thursday//An Attitude of Gratitude

All of a sudden it's November. I don't know about ya'll but I did NOT see that one comin'. But here in the Northwest, it's been lovely. Crisp, cool days, a whistle of wind, leaves fluttering down - not quite crunchable, but almost.

However, I know that when the skies turn and the rain comes and stays. And stays....and stays...my attitude will also turn.

Lately I've been noticing that my reaction to my day is more closely linked to my attitude than the circumstances that arise. Some people have just sucktackular days - nothing goes right and calamity after calamity after calamity occur. Others have just crappy attitudes about random stuff - calamities or not.

I definitely fall into the latter category. My attitude drives my day and generally, it's not a good one. Grumbling and complaining about nothing and everything have become almost as much a part of my speech as conversations about Dr. Pepper, missing my sister and loving Veritas have been.

So, in honor of Thanksgiving, Talk Thursday and this crisp fall day: Do you possess an "attitude of gratitude" in the midst of even sucky circumstances? Or do you allow your attitude, in either good or bad situations to drive your day? If the latter, do you have any inclination to change this habit or are you ok with it?

Happy Thursday, kids!

Church, Children & the Living Dead

If you know anything about me (Hi! I'm Sarah Lewis, by the way!) you know that I love the Bible. And if you know any secondary thing about me, you know that I don't care for children. There are other things that you likely know but those are the two pertinent to this conversation.

However, because God thinks He's sooooo funny, He has put me into a ministry that I NEVER expected to be in, nor did I ever expect to love. Since January 2010 I have been serving as the Director of Children's Ministry (the Orchard) for Veritas Church. It is extremely administrative (which I love) and it is kids-y (which I'm learning to be ok with). In spite of having no idea what I'm doing and consistently feeling like I'm going to ruin these children forever, God has continued giving me a spirit of purpose and intentionality for teaching these kids the truth of His word.

As the Director I've had the opportunity to decide how the curriculum will work and what our kids learn about the Bible and Jesus. And I've come to a deep-set conviction that kids should be as engaged with the Scriptures as adults are. Suuuure, they may not grasp it all, but if they can be exposed to the truths of Scripture early enough, it may not be as unfamiliar to them later in life. Therefore, whatever sermon series our adults are learning Sunday to Sunday is the same series that our kids will be learning (with some exceptions). We also hope that this will enable more ability for families to interact with the Bible and what they're learning.

All that to say: I'm having a great time.

However, since we've been writing (for the most part) the children's lessons alongside the sermons, I have had to write (with significant help!) the majority of the lessons. I was so hopeful that the internet would give me all that I needed. Boy, was I wrong! But since we've developed lessons for these kids, I thought it would be wrong not to share them.

Thusly, I am posting all of the lessons from our Fruits of the Spirit series and the Living Dead series on my other blog: Priscilla's Ponderings. Feel free to share them with your church or children's minister or use them for whater'e you need. We teach our kids to share, so I ought to practice it with ya'll! =)

Keep in mind that these lessons are designed for our very small church, with very limited resources. But they could easily be adapted for any size church or setting.

Hope you enjoy! (And if you don't, please don't tell me, cause I'm sensitive.) =)

Talk Thursday // Halloween

When I was a kid, I had extremely conservative parents. We were not allowed to trick or treat, talk about witches, ghouls or vampires, and all Halloween festivities had to be done under the guise of a "Harvest Party." Now as an adult, I just don't care for Halloween. I've never cared for scary movies, slutty costumes or masks (they give me the heebie-jeebies). Therefore, Halloween has never held much excitement for me. My Halloween tradition has become watching "Luther" after whatever Halloween party I attend (I like candy & people, therefore I'll go to a party).

However, since its Talk Thursday and I can smell pumpkins & candy in the air, mingled with the stench of costume sweat, let's take a Halloween survey:

1. How did you celebrate Halloween growing up? Or did you at all?

2. What is your favorite Halloween-esque movie?

3. Do you have any Halloween traditions?

4. What are your plans for this Halloween weekend?

5. What will you be dressing up as?

This picture still cracks my stuff up.

Happy Halloween!!

Monday is a Good Day for Bad Poetry

Fall is here

Winter grows near

Rain drips, drips, drips through the trees

And causes the falling down of brightly colored leaves

Cider, cocoa & coffee sound delighfully warm

This time of year makes me greatly miss Memorial's dorm

Pumpkins are being carved

While we're beginning to pull out the scarves

Soon the frost will come

Which is totally dumb

Much like the progression of these rhymes

But I thank you anyway for your time(s)

Go crunch a leaf

Or eat a bowl of soupy beef

Enjoy this season of fall

And I will bid adieu to you all.