All-Nighter?! All-Righter!

Well, I'm going to attempt something I haven't done since college.

The all-nighter.

In college, I was younger; I was able to operate on less sleep; my brain functioned more easily at night.

I don't think it works that way anymore.

However, I am prepared for this evening:

* Ample amounts of caffeine - check!

* A solid iTunes playlist - check!

* A nap under my belt - check!

* Sweatpants/fuzzy socks - check!

* Books/articles/compy - check!

* The pressure of procrastination and that if I don't get this done tonight, I fail my classes for the semester - check!

Tonight's all-nighter will be taking place at Shari's. Thank You, Jesus, for restaurants who provide unending coffee and have free wi-fi.

Hopefully I don't "Murtaugh" this up and cave after an hour or so.

Note to Self:

Never, ever, ever, ever, ever listen, read, watch or observe any doings of the westboro "baptist church" before going to bed.

It will only make you hot with rage.

The upside: you pray 1,000 harder for Jesus to move in people's hearts.

I am not generally a hateful person (squirrels, robots and bananas aside). And I try (and sometimes fail) to think the best of people and not talk bad about people behind their backs. And I try really hard to trust that the Holy Spirit actually resides in most people who profess to follow Christ.

The phelps phamily of the westboro "baptist church" is one group that I have not yet learned to do any of the above yet (Jesus is still working on me). When I think about the message of hate they spread...when I think about the havoc they wreck on lives of thousands of people...when I think about how terribly they pervert the name of Jesus Christ in the world...my heart breaks.

And they are not the only group who takes this God-awful (yes, I mean that literally) approach to human interaction and biblical reflection. There are millions of individuals who daily live hate rather than love, who show apathy rather than compassion, who proclaim God's wrath and completely disregard the joy of His mercy. And there are days when I do it as well: when I don't love those around me the way Christ asked me to, when I fail to proclaim His truth with my words and my actions, when I turn a blind eye to the "least of these."

In the moments where I realize that I too have fallen short of God's glorious intention for my life, for my relationships with others, with my relationship with Him, I think: "how much have I ruined someone's impression of Christ today?"

Seeing these people utterly pervert the message of the Bible makes it easy for me to understand why someone would gladly chose not to become a Christian. If I didn't absolutely believe that Jesus Christ is so much more than what these nimrods make Him out to be, I wouldn't allow myself to be clumped with them either.

Yet, I hold on to the promise that Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. He loved without restraint, He called out those hypocrites who blasphemed the name of God by turning His house into a casino, who cared more about a person's appearance than their heart, who loved themselves more than they loved the disenfranchised and the marginalized. Jesus Christ loved the broken, the down-trodden, the hopeless. He loves the single mom who has to dance exotically to pay rent; He loves the teenager hidden in the "closet"; He loves the alcoholic who panhandles for more booze; He loves the middle-class family who "do" church on Sunday, but have no idea how to follow Him once they leave the building; He loves the burn-out pastor, the woman struggling with depression, the bickering couple, the deadbeat dad, the seminary student who gets caught up learning about God rather than loving God.

None of these people are outside of the vastness of God's love. For each one, God wants to give so much more than what they think they can have. He wants to give His love and mercy and His perfect plan for relationship with Him. His love changes people; it changes people into people who love like God loves, who live like God intended them to live, who desire to be what God called them to be - holy, righteous sons and daughters of a Holy God.

"Christians" who hate don't exist. People who don't know the love of Jesus hate.

You'll know real Christians when you see them - they are messy and screwed up and broken, but by God...they love.

And I just need to pray a lot more that the love of Jesus will change a particular family in Kansas.

Talk Thursday//Things that make the baby Jesus cry

1. Cold oatmeal

2. The smell of broccoli soup in enclosed spaces

3. Farmville

4. Wet socks

5. Tepid bathwater

6. When cell phones say "No Service"

7. Cats

8. Blue Christmas lights

9. Dropping food on a solid colored shirt

10. Greek homework


This list felt more like an anti-Oprah's favorite things list than things that make the baby Jesus cry. But I was going for seasonal relevance.

We have good things. Like steak...hamburgers...football...glitter. Then we all have bad things. This is not to be a Debbie Downer, but let's admit it: sometimes things are stupid.

So, what things in your world are the worst? What things do you think make the baby Jesus cry?

On Why Being Human Sometimes Sucks

YesterdayI had to recite Genesis 1.1-5 in Hebrew to my professor and then read aloud Deuteronomy 6.4-9 to her. Because of the tremendous difficulty of this situation I forewarned her that sometimes, when I'm stressed and discouraged and I forget things and though Jesus and I are working on it, sometimes I swear.


I did not expect her reaction.

She laughed and said that it was her most favorite reading ever. And we hadn't even started yet. This made me feel good. Then when she composed herself (which was only barely composed) she said, "That is so refreshingly human, Sarah. I really appreciate that." This comment made me feel...not as good. And it took me well over an hour to be able to figure out why her comment said completely in kindness and as a compliment made my heart hurt a little.

I have tried to live my life as transparently as possible. 98% of the time I am the same Sarah on Friday nights that I am on Sunday mornings that I am on Tuesday and Thursday afternoons. Obviously there are moments where I want to hide who I am (there's that pesky 2%) and I'll lie and distort who I am. And I also understand that there are situations that require less..."flamboyant" Sarah - ie: for work there is more structured behavioral expectation and maybe not swearing in from of my Orchard kiddos. But 98% of the time my personality doesn't change.

While I truly believe this is a good thing and that Jesus wants us to live our lives in vulnerability and openly and honestly about who we are in Him, there is still a tension.

As someone who wholeheartedly believes in the life, death and resurrection of Jesus, I also believe that the same Spirit that rose Jesus Christ from the dead resides in my body. And I believe that the Bible tells us that those who are in faith in Jesus are to walk by the Spirit and not by the flesh (see the apostle Paul's discussion as it is pretty much a word-for-word screen shot of my brain).

We are called to live honestly, openly, vulnerably in communion with one another and with God in the hope that others will desire to be open and vulnerable and honest with themselves and with God. To this end I generally succeed.

However, we are also called to live holy lives, to be set apart, to walk by the power of the Spirit. Therein lies my tension.

As a seminarian, I am around a lot of very...I don't think pious is the right word...people. They are not "holier than thou" teetotalers, but they love Jesus with all their hearts and they talk about that and sometimes it makes me feel...too human in comparison. Because more often than not I find myself living completely in my humanity more than I find myself desiring to live as a holy child of God, physically, emotionally, mentally... Living in my humanity is comfortable, it is easy. I don't have to strive to be anything more than what I am. And I think God loves that. He wants us to just be.

But I know that He wants more for us as well. He wants us to live justly and love mercy and walk humbly and have our minds dwell on good things. But my humanity is so much more accessible. And that's frustrating.

I love that my Hebrew professor felt that my vulnerability made me more "human" and hopefully she felt the freedom to be vulnerable as well - since that is the goal.

But some days I wouldn't mind being told that it was refreshing how much my speech caused someone else to love Jesus.

Guess that's just the human in me though.

Dr. Freud? A Moment Please

Which of the following is not true about my most recent dreams?

A. Reggie & Ladye Love Smith yelling at me while Michael W. Smith (no relation) laughs at me because I can't scrape an ice rink?

B. Being involved in a group psychiatry ADD assessment where they refer to Jesus as "Patrick" and my best friend performs an interpretive dance for Jesus/Patrick as a cracking egg?

C. Mistakenly sending a text message and subsequently defenestrating myself in horror as a way of escape from the ramifications of said text?

D. Creating a life-size Shark/Whale exhibit in a hollowed out boat hull with a team consisting of a small child, a 40-year-old HS dropout and (I think) Mel Brooks?

If you answered "None of the above", you would be totally right.

Apparently, my subconscious is a crazy person. If I didn't know better, I'd say this was a result of too many drugs/alcohol. But I know better. Maybe I should lay off the Dr. Pepper....it must be getting to me.

Is anyone out there a dream interpreter? Cause I have some questions for you!

Talk Thursday // Joy

Oh look....a Talk Thursday on a Thursday...how ideal. =)

So this Sunday in the Orchard (not a real orchard people - a figurative orchard), our little Veritas kiddos will be learning about the Fruit of the Spirit of Joy. It is elusive and abstract and tricky to wrap our minds around. My question was at first "How do I concretize joy for little people?" (not midgets, just young humans) But then, the more I considered it, the question became "What IS Joy?"

Is joy just being happy all the time? Is it not letting anything get you down? Is the joy joy joy joy down in your heart? (Where?!)

It seemed natural to equate joy with happiness to help the kids see the meaning. And the illustrations were easy - when you're sad, if you have Jesus, you have joy and you can smile. If you have to go to the dentist and are nervous or angry, if you have Jesus, you have joy and you can smile. If your sister punches you in the face and you're crying and bleeding and mad, if you have Jesus, you have joy and you can smile.

That seems right. It seems like people have always said that Christians need to always be happy and have a smile on their face and not let anything get them down.

But then I thought about it again.

If we are created in the image of God and our God is a God of deep, deep emotion (and not just the good ones!), why then does it follow that we as Christians should only emote happy things? When we're sad, we can be sad. When we're angry, it's ok to be angry, as long as we don't sin in our anger. Any emotion that we feel is alright - as long as it doesn't lead to or cause us to sin. If we teach that joy means happiness and that to follow Christ means always being happy, then we are teaching that sadness, sorrow, pain, anger, disappointment, depression, etc are sinful feelings.

I think that the opposite of Joy is Despair. If we lived our lives without the hope of Christ, it is far easier to fall into Despair. But we can have Joy because we have hope in the truth of Christ. We can be sad and angry and all those things and still have JOY because we can still trust Jesus to take care of us. That sounds naiive and too easy, but I think it's meant to be that way.

Our joy is not predicated upon our circumstances; our happiness can be.

So after all that, my question to you is:

Do you have joy?
Is it an easy thing for you to remember?
Do you have the wonderful-love-of-my-blessed-Redeemer-way-down-in-the-depths-of-your-heart? (thanks Psalty!)

The Marriage Builder

I'm not married. Nor have I ever been married. So when I recommend the thing I'm about to, I want you to know that it's coming from a perspective of someone who watches other people's marriages and hears the marriage secrets of her married friends, but has no first-hand experience.

For a class this semester I'm reading The Marriage Builder by Larry Crabb. This might be a broad statement, but I honestly believe that anyone is married, will be married or has even thought about getting married needs to read this book. And even if marriage isn't on your mind, this book has some great insight for relationships in general.

Crabb writes from a counselor's point of view for other counselors, but he writes from a personal perspective of his own relationship with his wife. His intention is to help couples find that elusive "oneness" that most people expect in their marriage but can't seem to find. The crux of it all isn't better communication, better sex, or better action, but resting in the love of Christ. "Suuuure..." you say, "It's as easy as that." I have problems as a single lady resting in the love of Christ; I can't imagine what life would be like trying to live with someone else who also can't find rest in Him and both of us are struggling to have the other person meet our needs that can only be fulfilled in Christ.

Most devotional books really bother me because they say a lot but don't help see how to put those principles into concrete practice. Crabb, on the other hand, has concrete ways to daily practice ministering to one's spouse.

I have about 9 pages to go to end this bad boy. So if on page 147 he says "I love satan" or something like that, I'm very sorry (for SOOO many reasons). But if it ends as well as it has been going this whole time, you'll be in for a very helpful and eye-opening read.

Is anyone else reading something that we should all be reading? If so, what is it?

Talk Thursday // Eggs, Deities, and Marketing

Oh man! I totally got you guys! That was awesome! You totally thought!!...but I!!....oh man!! April Fool's Day classic!! Making you think there was no Talk Thursday! Bahahahahahaha!!!!!

Ok, that was a lot of exclamations. I apologize. Moving on....

Seeing as how we're in the spirit of the Easter season and there are so many different opinions and viewpoints on this particular holiday, I'd like to ask how you celebrate Easter. I assume that most of my readers don't have kids (and by "readers" I mean the 3 of you that I KNOW don't have kids), but if you did, what would you teach your children about Easter, the bunny, Jesus? How did your parents explain all of it to you? What did you do when you found the Easter Bunny wasn't real but he was your creepy neighbor? Whoa...weird.











And Bonus question: who would win in a street fight - Jesus or the Easter Bunny? Jesus has angels, the Easter Bunny has hard-boiled eggs flying 87 miles/hour at your face.






And go!

It's Finally Here...

Ukraine.

* It is the largest country in Europe - slightly smaller than Texas
* There are 49 million + residents
* It is highly developed with 98% of Ukrainians who are literate
* The national "religion" is Eastern Orthodox Christianity

But do they know Jesus?



Less than 72 hours from right now, I will be heading off into the sunset of Brusilov, Ukraine with a team of 6 people from across the Unites States.

We don't know what we'll be doing.
We don't know each other.
We don't know what to expect.

And yet we're going.



I'll be real honest - I'm not excited yet. I'm not scared, but I'm not stoked. The prayer is that God will change my heart and attitude dramatically in the next two days.

I can't wait to share this experience with you all.

On Why I Forget Jesus isn't Keith Urban

Confession: I have a major jones for Keith Urban. I think he's smolderingly gorgeous, extrordinarily talented and he's from Australia - the trifecta of attraction, really. At his Escape Together concert the other night, I was entranced. As his high-power guitar riffs wailed through the Tacoma Dome, I was so completely overwhelmed and caught up with the music that I didn't even know what I felt. At one point during the concert, he even came within about 10 rows of us. Momentarily, I weighed the option of tearing down those steps like a pre-teen at a Hannah Montana show or just enjoying the ride like a normal, sane 24-year-old. Lucky for all of us, option 2 won.

There are significant moments when I think Jesus is like Keith Urban.

Is it the hair? Maybe....




But really, I think it's mostly that I treat Jesus like some eternal, cosmic celebrity.

As much as I like and respect Keith Urban and would love to be his friend, I'm not. We don't have a relationship, he doesn't know me. I don't know who he is or what he's about. I know the music he has written or played and I know who he's married to, but really that's where it ends. There is nothing substantial drawing us together.

I often think of Jesus the same way. I like and respect him; I would love to be His friend; I know about who He is, and really, sometimes that's where it ends.

Except that it's completely not true - we are intricately and substantially draw together. Jesus knows me - intimately! We are friends (even when I forget); I know what He's about because He's told me and left a love letter unpacking the details. I even know who His bride is - it's me! Whenever I hear His love song, I get overwhelmed and in awe of the power of His music. He'll even come within a few rows of me, but because I don't want to look insane, I choose not to run and embrace Him.

Keith Urban will never stop his concert, step up to the mic and say in his sexy, Aussie drawl, "Sarah Nicole Lewis, I love you. Escape together with me."

But Jesus would. And Jesus did. He didn't stop a concert - He stopped the power of sin and death and said "Sarah Nicole Lewis, I love you. I love you when you forget that I'm intimately involved in the details of your life. I love you even when you don't want me to be involved. I love you when you compare me to a country music star and forget that we're friends. I love you because of your loud laugh and your expressive nature and your big hair. I love you so much that I died and came back to life so we could be eternally and completely drawn together."

Keith Urban may be super talented and Nicole Kidman may be a lucky, lucky woman, but at the end of the day, Jesus knows me.

And I'm good with that.

Talk Thursday // Jesus & Art?

I am a believer in Jesus.

I am also a lover of the arts.

For some, it is hard to find the proper way to balance the two. "Traditional Christianity" says that you can't cuss, you can't drink and you can't go out with girls who do (no wonder I'm single). But much of the arts - theatre, music, paintings, spoken word, life - try to depict the real world, not simply an ideal world. That world involves cussing, drinking, and real-life problems that can't be wrapped in a happy little bow at the final curtain.

I went to a conference on my birthday that was about how the Church should be inclusive of the artistic community not only because it's there but because it is who we are designed to be. The premise of the conference was that if God is an expressive, creative designer and He created us in His image, then humanity as His creation is therefore expressive and creative and given to those impulses as well. For so long the Church has been unwilling to understand the need for good artistic expression and has produced art that is not only not good, but also unreal and unreflective of the world we live in.

Tonight I'm going to go see RENT, the Broadway musical. The major themes of the play are love, suffering, joy, relationships, community, true identity. However, there are many Christians who have (and continue to) boycott this show (and others like it) because some of the characters are homosexual, some do drugs, and there is foul language.

The question today is how do you view art? If you're a believer, how do you balance Jesus and the arts? If you're not a believer, how do you feel about the Church's typical response toward the artistic community? How can we change it?

(This isn't part of the question, but I'm SOOOO excited because it's Adam Pascal and Anthony Rapp in the show tonight! The end. =) )

Being, Not Doing

"...mission is not primarily about going. Nor is mission primarily about doing anything. Mission is aboutbeing. It is about being a distinctive kind of people, a countercultural, multinational community among the nations. It is modeling before a skeptical world what the living God of the BIble is really like. Whether we remain all our lives in the towns of our birth or travel to the slums of Calcutta or the wastelands of Madison Avenue, we are all called to mission. For mission is to put our lives on the cutting edge where God is at work. And we have seen in this passage that God is at work challenging the false gods of culture, religion, and the marketplace; God is at work seeking justice for the widow, the orphan and the alien; and God is at work freeing men and women, giving them new identities that transcend those of class and tribe and nation. What was true to Israel's calling is also true for our calling as the church of Jesus Christ: "They are to be a people set apart, different from all other people by what they are and what they are becoming - a display people, a show-case to the world of how being in covenant with Yahweh changes a people."'

- The Message of Mission, by Howard Peskett and Vinoth Ramachandra

Christ Is Risen...

I know you know the tag line...

C'mon... say it all together now....

=)

Today is Easter. Christians around the world celebrate the resurrection of Jesus Christ. But today isn't the only day to celebrate this. EVERY day we should celebrate Easter. Early Christians began meeting on Sundays as a way to remember the resurrection - Jesus rose on a Sunday morning, therefore corporate Christian worship was to be on Sunday morning. Easter is not the only Resurrection Sunday. Every Sunday, every DAY is Resurrection Day. Because Jesus is forever resurrected. And every day we need to celebrate that awesome truth. 

"But on the first day of the week, at early dawn, they came to the tomb bringing spices which they had prepared. And they found the stone rolled away from the tomb, but when they entered, they did not find the body of the Lord Jesus. While they were perplexed about this, behold, two men suddenly stood near them in dazzling clothing; and as the women were terrified and bowed their faces to the ground, then men said to them, "Why do you seek the living One among the dead? He is not here, but He has risen." (Luke 24.1-6a)

I know I don't celebrate or remember the resurrection of Jesus everyday. But everyday I need to. In the words of Bill and Gloria (oh yes, I went there...): "Because He lives, I can face tomorrow. Because He lives, all fear is gone. Because I know Who holds the future. And life is worth the living just because He lives." That's why we celebrate today, this Easter Sunday. And hopefully tomorrow I will wake up remembering what the resurrection means again. 

Happy Easter, friends. 

Dear Jesus,

i know You know everything. and i appreciate that about Your character. i also know that You have good plans for Your children. i hate to be a bother and i know there are much bigger things going on in the world, but i do have one small request...

is there any way You could make it warmer in the Evergreen State? i mean, seriously, it's April 3rd and it just snowed. This is just a little rickdiculous. i promise not to use the sun as an excuse to parade around in skimpy outfits. it would just be really nice to wear flip-flops. 

ok, God, thanks for listening. You're great. and if You don't want it to be sunny/warm/springtime here in the Pacific Northwest, i'll still love You and give You glory.

i'd just really like to glorify You in 80 degree weather. 

In Jesus' Name, 

Amen

Three Questions You Don't Expect to Answer In Starbucks

1. What do you believe in?

2. How is your relationship with Jesus?

3. What do you believe about satan? (for you SCL fans, you'll recognize the middle finger of grammar there)

Tonight I went to Starbucks to read the previously mentioned book o' boring and while sipping a London Fog Latte, a young man began making conversation with me. He asked me about my book (which I was brutally honest about) and I politely asked about his (he was reading about Chinese calligraphy). The conversation continued in a small-talk fashion until he asked once more about my reading selection. He wanted to know why I was reading about ministry management. Now, normally, I'm a pretty closed off individual - I don't like to share personal things (please sense the completely ridiculosity of that statement), but I began sharing with him that I'm a seminary student at Multnomah, that I live in the Seattle area and that I'm going to school to get more training to do ministry. 

OUT OF THE BLUE, he asks question #1: What do you believe in? When I looked at him a little blankly, he followed up with What religion are you? Finally, I overcame my shock and told him I was Evangelical Protestant (I didn't really want to get into the whole Southern Baptist thing) and that I believed in Jesus. That conversation led to a few more questions on his part and I turned the questions back on him. He grew up Catholic, but had tried many other religions and has landed on Jehovah's Witness. He believes in everything and nothing (his words). We chatted for a few minutes about his religious upbringing and Jehovah's Witness in particular when again...

OUT OF THE BLUE, he asks question #2: How is your relationship with Jesus? Having really never been asked that question outside religious institutions, I had to be completely honest and say that, like any relationship, it ebbs and flows, but He always leads me back to deep connectedness with Himself eventually. This train of conversation continued again for a few minutes and included some other topics. 

THEN RANDOMLY, during a lull in conversation, he asked me question #3: What do I believe about satan? At this point, I had to be really honest and tell him what I knew from the Bible, but that I hadn't ever really thought through my personal thoughts on satan and evil spirits, etc. 

All in all... it was a little awkward. But it was life. And it was real. We don't believe in the same things; he doesn't believe in the things that his church does. But it was absolutely apparent from our brief conversation that he loves people and wants to know people. Which made me realize that the Bible is right (which, I guess, really shouldn't be a shocker to me) when God says "But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect..." (1 Peter 3.15). Someone asked me to articulate what I believed about Jesus, His church and His enemy. And I have to admit, I was not as prepared as I could have been.

So the question today is: how would you answer those questions? No matter what religious or non-religious background you have, how do you articulate what beliefs you hold? What make you who you are? What do you value? In what or in whom is your hope placed?

Hopefully, the next time I'm at Starbucks presented with questions like that, I'll be prepared to answer. Cause apparently you never know what can happen at Starbucks. =)

Talk Thursday // Labor of Love

• Now in those days a decree went out from Caesar Augustus, that a census be taken of all the inhabited earth. This was the first census taken while Quirinius was governor of Syria. And everyone was on his way to register for the census, each to his own city. Joseph also went up from Galilee, from the city of Nazareth, to Judea, to the city of David which is called Bethlehem, becausehe was of the house and family of David, 
• in order to register along with Mary, who was engaged to him, and was with child. While they were there, the days were completed for her to give birth. And she gave birth to her firstborn son ; and she wrapped Him in cloths, and laid Him in a manger, because there was no roomfor them in the inn. 
• In the same region there were some shepherds staying out in the fields and keeping watch over their flock by night. 
• And an angel of the Lord suddenly stood before them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them; and they were terribly frightened. But the angel said to them, "Do not be afraid ; for behold, I bring you good news of great joy which will be for all the people; for today in the city of David there has been born for you a Savior, who is Christ the Lord. 
• "This will be a sign for you: you will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger. "And suddenly there appeared with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God and saying, 
• "Glory to God in the highest, And on earth peace among men with whom He is pleased." When the angels had gone away from them into heaven, the shepherds began saying to one another, "Let us go straight to Bethlehem then, and see this thing that has happened which the Lord has made known to us." So they came in a hurry and found their way to Mary and Joseph, and the baby as He lay in the manger. When they had seen this, they made known the statement which had been told them about this Child. And all who heard it wondered at the things which were told them by the shepherds. But Mary treasured all these things, pondering them in her heart. The shepherds went back, glorifying and praising God for all that they had heard and seen, just as had been told them.

~ Luke 2.1-20 ~

He came because of love. Not out of convenience or obligation or judgment. 

God made Himself incarnate in human flesh to be the redemption for us. Immanuel - just like He promised.

The King of Kings and the Lord of Lords, the Prince of Peace and the Wonderful Counselor.

God help us remember the gift  You gave in Jesus beyond today. 

Merry Christmas.