Thursday, December 17, 2009

Talk Thursday // Letter to Santa

Dear Santa,

I know that a lot of fundamentalist Christians have a problem with you. They see "satan" instead of "Santa." And I'm sorry for that. That must suck. You get a lot of flack from a lot of people and I don't want to give that to you. Sure, I have some weirdness with you coming in through people's chimmneys (but if you came through a window, I suppose I'd be more creeped out) and those flying reindeer kinda freak my stuff out. And I won't even go into the elves you have up in the North Pole, especially Elf on a Shelf (except for that Will Ferrell movie...that was hilarious!)

All that to say that, I feel pretty ambiguous towards you. You're a jolly guy who, for some reason in every mall around the world, makes small children cry. If you're so jolly, why do they cry so much? I think it's a valid question. But I'll likely tell my unlikely future children the story of Ol' Saint Nikolas, cause that's a pretty freaking cool story.

Santa, thanks for reading this blog. And thanks for helping kids have imaginations. Good times.

In closing, can I leave you with some of my Christmas list? I've been pretty good this year, I think (leaving out the incidents with over-spending at Wal-Mart).

* iPhone
* Any Word Biblical Commentary
* the "Firefly" season

* Peace in my family
* Help with my friend's burned-down house
* Veritas church moving in the community

I know you're not God and can't do some of those things. But whatever you can help with, that'd be great. And I'm going to let my friends leave their lists too. Since we know you're reading the blog.

Merry Christmas Santa.


What would you say to Santa? And what's on your Christmas list?


MoMountainGrrl said...

some of my students told me that Santa wasn't I pretended to get hysterically upset...I think I freaked them out a little and had some of them convinced that yes, I a 23 year old was horribly crushed that they had told me there was no santa....

anyway, I digress.

On my list this year in position numero uno is a Kitchen Aid Artisan Stand Mixter in Pistachio.

And if Santa was feeling REALLY generous he'd bring me a 12 pc. Le Creucet cookware set from Williams Sonoma in Lemongrass to match my mixer and my Lu Ray dishes. but he's have to be feeling REALLY REALLY extravagant because I am nothing if not full of expensive taste. :)

Sarah Lewie said...

Maybe Santa would get it for you if you promised to make him cookies with it. =)

Heather Cowden (haha) said...

Here is my list:
1. A job for Stephen
2. A job for me
3. To move Texas, Missouri, and Washington, Oklahoma, and Illinois all right next to each other.
(is rearranging a continent too much to ask?)

Sarah Lewie said...

I once came up with a plan to rearrange the continent. Unfortunately for you, Texas was not included in said rearrangment. I sent it to live with Kansas somewhere near Zimbabwe.

I redact my decision and will be joining you in asking Santa for a new and improved United States. =)

Sara said...

I'm with Heather on rearranging states!
Washington and Wyoming would look very nice together.

Christopher Maples said...

I also join in the cause of re-arranging the US.

I also join in the decision of banish-er *cough* sending Kansas to do Mission work near Zimbabwe.

That is all.

Jenny said...

Dear Santa,

All I want is for people to stop hating on my home state. Kansas has been good to us over the years... where do they think all their bread comes from? Seriously.

Well... I guess that's not all I want. A date would be nice too.

Thanks Santa - I know you're busy right now, so.. that's all. It's been a pretty good year, so...

Merry Christmas. And, don't worry... I don't care if I'm 100 years old and without children, I'll still leave you milk and cookies, because the death of hope (no matter how irrational) is not something I can handle.



Heather Cowden said...

You can send Kansas where ever you want, but you have to reconcile your differences with Texas. I live there now. So does your B-I-L.. Therefore, I accept your help in the rearrangement of the continent. Although I've come up with an even better plan. It involves removing stratigic cities/landmarks and creating a new awesome-r state... I'll keep you posted.

Madonna said...

Santa baby, just slip a sable under the tree, for me
Been an awful good girl
Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight

Santa baby, a '54 convertible too, light blue
I'll wait up for you dear Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight

Think of all the fun I've missed
Think of all the fellas that I haven't kissed
Next year I could be just as good
If you'd check off my Christmas list
Boo doo bee doo

Santa baby, I wanna yacht and really that's
Not a lot
Been an angel all year
Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight

Santa honey, one thing I really do need, the deed
To a platinum mine
Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight

Santa cutie and fill my stocking with a duplex, and checks
Sign your 'X' on the line
Santa cutie, and hurry down the chimney tonight

Come and trim my Christmas tree
With some decorations bought at Tiffany
I really do believe in you
Let's see if you believe in me
Boo doo bee doo

Santa baby, forgot to mention one little thing, a ring
I don't mean on a phone
Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight
Hurry down the chimney tonight
Hurry ... tonight